The moment I open my mouth and say, “I am a servant leader”, I fool myself – for by saying that, I prove that I am not. The man that I am apart from my God, is utterly worthless, and my striving after Christ, to be a servant leader, to be a leader that is like Him is in no way of myself nor of my own power, for apart from His gracious call, all my efforts would but crumble to the ground. He is the one who calls, therefore in all things, I will not boast in myself, but in Him. Though I fear man, He has taught me to fear Him and Him alone. I strive to stand on His Word, His truth, not on the opinions of men for men can only kill my body, but God is the Lord of both my body and my spirit. And so, by His grace, I have left my life in America to go and fulfill His command to preach the Gospel to all peoples, for though men call me a fool, and think I am ruining my future, I will do His bidding, whatever that may be. Although I hate suffering, He has taught me to consider suffering as pure joy, for through suffering, when I am stripped of all comfort I seek Him, and I see Him as more beautiful than before. And so as those I lead fall away I am compelled to entreat them to repent, disregarding myself and what they might think, so that their soul might be saved; as those I lead are persecuted for their faith, I am compelled to walk beside them, so that I might protect them from the blows and bear the grunt of the persecution for them. I associate myself with the persecuted church in neighboring countries, to minister to them and to serve as an example to those who follow me, that bride of Christ might persevere in the faith – though I suffer, though I die – for I am compelled by a love that is not my own. Even though I am proud, He has taught me that I am but a worm and so in all I accomplish in my life and in my ministry, though people try to praise me, I can do nothing but direct their attention to God, for He has done it. Though I love to be served, He has taught me to serve others in love, and so, disregarding the worldly comforts of the American dream and all that this world loves to receive in service to self, I deny myself and serve the people that God has brought under my leadership they too might see the beauty of God and worship and serve Him alone. I fear man, I hate suffering, I am prideful, and I love to be served. I am not a servant leader; He is a servant leader in me.